Due to my ongoing newfound mental & emotional stability which has blessed me over the last few months, lately I seam to have brief moments of absolute perfection. They seam to happen when I'm out by myself, either walking or in my car.

One happened a couple of weeks ago at the weekend. I went for a walk up on the hill. There was nothing particularly special going on. It was somewhere I had been many times, and the day was slightly overcast. But I was overwhelmed with this sense of joy at just being, just simply being, just being me and being around nature and passing other people walking along the lane. It was nothing I could put into words at the time. I felt no anxiety at wishing anyone was there with me to share the joy, I just simply allowed myself to experience it, and in that moment that's all that mattered. This is what I believe true happiness is. It's not a material thing, it can't be bought. It's not about a particular place. It's not even about another person. It's simply about finding a natural joy within yourself which only happens when your mental/physical/emotional health is totally in balance.

The most recent one happened on thursday evening. I was driving my car up the hill out of my small town. I was on my way to another town for my yoga class. It began to snow, and as my headlights eluminated the falling snow in front of my car, I began to feel a similar feeling again, like nothing even mattered, and I was just right there in that moment, just me as myself, experiencing the beauty of these white droplets of joy falling from the sky. I felt totally free, I was on my way to something I enjoyed doing. It wasn't even about that really though, it was the sense of freedom and peace. As the journey went on, the snow got heavier, and as I drove along the roads, I began to get hynotised by the eluminated droplets speeding towards my eyes, and I almost went into a trance. It was like sliding into another dimension, whatever that's like.

And to think that, not so long ago, I used to be a complete mental headcase with anxiety, obsessions, bizarre phobias, etc, etc, etc.

And people go on and on about what life is about, about you should do this, you should do that, all about careers and meating the right people and doing the right things, challenging yourself and achieving things. Some people even talk about religion and God and all those kinds of things. All of it is complete nonsense. Every last bit of it. ALL THAT REALLY MATTERS IS YOUR HEALTH. Get that right, and everything else will naturally slide into place.

I used to desperately clutch onto things, onto ideas and meanings and activities, obsessively, like they were all that were keeping me afloat in the stormy waters of my disturbed mental state. I didn't even realise at the time that I actually had several physical things wrong with me which were making me feel like that.

But now I'm experiencing something I don't think I EVER experienced previously in my life. The ability to just be.

Such a dramatic change, simply from using eating the right diet and using special nutritional supplements to reduce my high histamine level.

Of course, the St John's Wort probably has something to do with it too though. Although it's not the whole solution, because I was taking it for a while previously, and I never felt quite like this before. This is something entirely different. This is what it's like to be healthy and normal.

I'll probably be able to stop taking the St John's Wort eventually. But what's the rush? It's totally safe. I've never experienced any side effects from it at all. And it has various other health benefits too, such as fighting infections. To put it into perspective, even if I did end up taking it for the rest of my life, I'd still be 100 times better off than all the millions of people in the world who smoke, drink alchohol, smoke cannabis and take caffeine every day, all of which are actually known to be harmful to your health (Some health reports say that a small amound of alcohol in moderation is good for your heart, but this is overshadowed by the fact that it is an antinutrient, which means it kills nutrients - also, it is addictive, so people do actually often struggle with the "in moderation" side of the equation. If you're healthy anyway, your heart will be perfectly healthy anyway.). Not to mention the worse drugs. I don't do any of those things. All I do is take a safe herb which has no side effects, causes no health problems, and just simply makes my already wonderful state of being just that bit more perfect.

I just don't care. This is it, right how I am these days. This is pure happiness. Even if I died at 50, I don't care, if I get 24 years of this happiness, it's worth a million years of how I used to be.

Actually, depsite what the wonderful Patrick Holford says in his nutrition books about living healthily to a grand old age, I don't actually think I want that. If I'm still around when I'm in my 50s, I'll probably take up a few extreme sports. I'm a bit accident prone. Actually, it's quite an achievement that I've lasted 26 years without dancing naked off a tall building, it really does amaze me. Random thoughts: Flip-flops are stupid. Trees are lovely. Ban nude hang-gliding.