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Random Lie #6 - How The Universe Began

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First there was nothing. Yes, that's right, nothing, not even the word "nothing". Then suddenly from out of nowhere a supreme being (let's call him "God", just for fun) appeared when a loud bang happened. To begin with, God looked like a monkey and climbed an imaginary Space Tree, but later made himself a cave out of rubber, and lived there alone for many years. Then he created the planets, most of which didn't have life except for one which he called Earth, plus a few others many miles away, the inhabitants of which would fly many hours in their round dish-like vehicals to see Earth. The life on Earth was mainly monkeys and lizards and blind fish type things. One day, an apple fell sideways from a tree, and this gave God the idea to invent gravity, which pulled the aliens more towards the planet and made it harder for the monkeys to climb the trees. As a result, the monkeys went in search of bananas elsewhere, but couldn't find any away from the trees, so they died. God created Adam in the image of himself and told him to eat the apple. Adam ate the apple, and a women appeared naked before him. They had sex, and Eve got pregnant. Unfortunately, this first baby was just a giant eye, and so they had to have sex again, this time producing a huge litter of humans, enough to make a whole village. Soon, these people travelled and bred, and filled the entire planet. By this time, Planet Earth had developed its own independant conciousness called Satan, and destroyed itself in a gigantic explosion. The End.


My Other Blog: Tell the Sky

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  • I'm Marcus
  • From Wotton-under-Edge, Gloucestershire, United Kingdom
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